In one of my previous MI trainings, I had a participant who shared a story that has always stuck with me.
She was a nurse who was struggling with a certain medical issue that had been recommended for surgery. She was very reluctant to consider this option and when it was time to see her physician, she was prepared with all her reasons why she shouldn’t do it.
What happened next in that doctor’s office surprised her.
She told the training group, “When my doctor said to me …’I’m not going to try to convince you to have this surgery, I respect that this is your decision and that you know what’s best for you,’ all of my defenses melted away and I was open to hearing what he had to say. When I knew that he wasn’t going to push me, I didn’t need to argue anymore, I could relax, listen to what he had to say, and you know what? I ended up deciding to have the surgery after all.”
In Motivational Interviewing, we believe that our clients know themselves best; they know what they need and what they don’t.
Essentially, there are two experts in the room.
You are the expert in your profession and provide value to the conversation, and your client is the expert in him/herself/theirself.
This idea speaks to one of the main components of the spirit of MI….Partnership.
Partnering in the process of change with our clients supports their need for autonomy and respects their independence. In MI, it is not enough to just maintain this belief of client autonomy, but we must also communicate it to them. Verbalizing to them that we recognize that their decisions are their own, allows them to be reassured that their wishes will be respected and supported even if we would choose differently for ourselves.
And, as we saw in my participant’s example, it can allow our clients to put aside defenses and make more educated decisions about what’s best for them.
Motivational Interviewing Tip of the Week: When you have been in the client role, how has partnership with your providers impacted your decisions? I invite you to think more deeply about how you demonstrate partnership with your clients. How do you provide opportunities to collaborate and share power in the process of change?
May your holiday season bring you health & peace. Thank you for the work that you do. And thanks for sharing this time with me!
Sincerely,
~ Chris
