Let Me Clear My Throat! Ambivalence and Motivational Interviewing

(If DJ Cool’s Let Me Clear My Throat song just popped into YOUR head, welcome to my brain.)

It has come to my attention, via my kind and patient husband, that I clear my throat excessively every morning.  

First, I figured it was allergies. So I restarted my allergy medication.

But I was still clearing my throat every morning, a lot. 

But it’s only in the mornings, for the first half-hour or so. Not so bad.

He brought it up again. It was clearly bothering him.

So, I mentioned it to my doctor at my next annual physical. (Yep, this has been going on for years).

She encouraged me to try different allergy medication. So I did.

Even on the new medication, I was still clearing my throat every morning.

Then, I noticed I was clearing my throat mid-day too- if I had a cold smoothie. 

Hm, so cold drinks make it happen too. Probably not allergies then.

It is sure to be on Zoom for most of my work so I can just MUTE myself when I need to clear my throat! No one but my husband and kids would be the wiser. And the throat clearing continued. 

My sister told me it was reflux. I googled reflux.

But I’m not overweight, I don’t eat right before bed, I don’t even like spicy foods, and I sure as heck am not taking medication for a little throat clearing. (More sustain talk…)

And most importantly, I read about two clear triggers for acid reflux: coffee and tea.

Hmph. Quit drinking morning coffee? 

My throat clearing is not THAT bad to give up my morning caffeine!!

It was time for an experiment. I tried over-the-counter reflux medication for a week to see if it helped. It cleared it right up! But, I don’t like taking medication if I can help it, and I heard bad things about that stuff. (Back to sustain talk). 

Again, I was back to clearing my throat for the first half-hour every morning.

My kids noticed too and commented occasionally. I explained why it was happening, and what would solve the problem.

Next, I googled natural remedies for reflux, much more in line with my values. I ordered an herbal reflux remedy. Honestly, it tasted gross AND it didn’t seem to make a difference in the symptoms. It joined the collection of other barely used bottles of things on my shelf that I hold onto, just in case.

One day while I was driving my kids to school, clearing my throat excessively while sipping my morning tea, my youngest said, “Mom, you know you wouldn’t do that anymore if you stopped drinking tea.” 

I was aghast. She said it like it’s THAT simple. Stop drinking caffeine in the mornings! 

Are you feeling me??

If only change was that simple. Ambivalence about change is hard! And it’s NORMAL to feel two ways about change, and to be stuck smack in the middle.

I am clearly ambivalent about doing what it will take to heal the acid reflux and stop clearing my throat in the mornings. But every day, it niggles at me, as I sip my morning tea or coffee, thinking, “If I didn’t drink this, I wouldn’t clear my throat so much.” 

Being aware of the need for change, and not changing YET sucks.

It’s uncomfortable. It also has a name: cognitive dissonance. 

Knowing I need to change isn’t enough.

I wonder what will tip me from contemplation to preparation…

But for now, I shall finish my cuppa tea.

(Is your Righting Reflex itching?! Do you want to tell me what to do? About your own experiences? Mine Righting Reflex would go nuts if I was reading this about you!)

Motivational Interviewing Tip of the Week: Change is hard. Knowing we NEED to change isn’t enough most of the time. There are reasons for change AND reasons for staying the same. I invite you into a moment of self-compassion around anything you are stuck around, as well as your clients. Change is hard! Ambivalence is normal, and staying stuck in ambivalence for long periods of time is normal too! Connect there first. Then, you can become curious about their motivation to change.

Watch my full video here!